Cookies and Therapy

I don’t remember how it started exactly. One year I was baking Christmas cookies, and I believe our friend was in the neighborhood. He stopped over and the ex gave him some cookies hot out of the oven. Before I knew it, it was a full-blown party every year. We called it Cookie day, and I literally baked cookies all day in our tiny South Street apartment. I learned something about cookies. They will draw a crowd like nothing else. Even if you don’t eat them, they are a reminder of comfort, family, and love. The smell, the warmth, the […]

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The piano in the office

Piano

It always sat in the office. I remember a friend once saying it was like the White House growing up because every room in our house had a name. We had the office, the blue room, the nursery, the dining room, etc. But I always remember the piano being in the office. Our twin home was converted into a single one-floor house. The conversion was necessary because, with five women under one roof, one bathroom wasn’t going to cut it. Upstairs lived my grandparents and my Aunt Millie. Behind us was my Aunt and Uncle, on the side were cousins. […]

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Dragonflies and Heartbreak

2003, it was another long year for me. I was living right outside of Philadelphia and working for Verizon. It was a terrible job that paid really well. I sold ads for the yellow pages, and during my tenure, there learned everything I loved and hated about the corporate world. I drove a Dodge Durango that guzzled gas and was much larger than I needed. I lived in a twin home that had been built in a new development with perfectly lined streets. I had a yellow lab named Maine and a diamond on my finger. It was terrible. I […]

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Triggers and the bin

And just like that, tomorrow I’ll be divorced. It’s amazing how fast the process is to close the book on a 13-year relationship. The papers will be signed tomorrow morning, the negotiations are complete, and our marriage will be officially dissolved. Although, as of tomorrow, we will no longer legally be married, I believe that our hearts will still need more time to accept that truth. The ex came over this weekend to spend time with the pups and have breakfast. We spent some time talking and preparing to sign the papers. While there was no question this was the […]

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Fainting into the nativity scene

One time in high school, I fainted coming out of the shower. I was a known fainter in my youth, especially in church. In fact, there was one Christmas morning while doing the readings at mass with my Grandmother, that I fell right over into the nativity scene. Our priest didn’t miss a beat, but my mother made a sprint down the center aisle to revive me. I mean literally, the priest didn’t even stop mass because I’m sure he was thinking, “There goes that Saueraker girl, fainting again.” It was so known that I often fainted, my Grandmother kept […]

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24 Hours on Tinder

Shall we lighten it up a bit? I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been asked if I’m going to start dating again. The answer for right now is “no”, and I suspect that will remain the answer for a while. Having said that, I’m not immune to the desire of human interaction in a flirtatious capacity. I’ve always been a good flirt, which is said to be a trait of being a true Gemini. I crave human interaction. This is all probably related to self-worth and self-validation issues, but let’s save that for therapy. At the suggestion of […]

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