Babies and Puppies

At the end of every day, I tell myself that I will be fine. I know these feelings are temporary. I know that I am a very strong person. Here’s the surprise though, the bad feelings are not because of the divorce. Yes, divorce sucks, and losing your partner in any capacity is difficult, but I have come to peace with that. What I didn’t expect was all the other stuff. I wonder if it’s true that women have a biological disposition to be the caretaker? I know we hear that growing up, but I’m not a scientist, nor do […]

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Pizza and Dating

It was 2005. I was stuck in a familiar pattern that included cocktails, boredom, topped off with extreme restlessness. Living with my fabulous roommate in the city was so much fun, but on nights when we didn’t have plans, I would pace around the apartment lost in my thoughts. We lived in Queen Village, a more affluent section of Philadelphia, although we were working-class ladies. It was centralized enough that we could easily access the nightlife, and we took full advantage. We spent endless hours at Bar Noir, The Mansion, The Blue Horseshoe, and other places I can’t even remember […]

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Email and South Street

Sometimes email is not my friend. The subject line read, “Congratulations! Your divorce has been granted.” It was from my attorney informing me that the divorce decree had been approved by the courts. This is a formality, but marks the end of my marriage legally. Still in a state of shock, I called my mother first and then casually told some friends. They asked if I cried, but I didn’t cry. I started working frantically that day. Then, by night, had reverted to my teenage self, looking for a distraction in all the wrong places. When I was in High […]

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Dancing in the grocery store

Anytime I’m in a grocery store; I become wooed by the music. It’s usually 80’s pop with a good beat, and it reminds me of happy times. I’ve been known to dance in the aisles and often can be found singing along with zero regards for those around me. There have been many instances when the ex and I would stop the shopping cart and dance in the aisles together. I always secretly wished that people would join in, and a flash mob would start unexpectedly. One rule to live by, find someone who will dance with you anywhere, at […]

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Compromise and Trollies

5135 Kensington Avenue, St. Louis, Missouri. That address is forever embedded in my memory. Every Christmas morning, after making a giant pot of coffee, the first thing I do is press play on the movie “Meet me in St. Louis.” The songs, the costumes, and the magic of that film are woven into the tapestry of my holiday traditions. Sisters, Rose and Esther, faced the same struggles that most young women face. Trying desperately to get a husband, they linger on the porch and throw elaborate parties. It’s not so different than posting on social media to earn your crush’s […]

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Cookies and Therapy

I don’t remember how it started exactly. One year I was baking Christmas cookies, and I believe our friend was in the neighborhood. He stopped over and the ex gave him some cookies hot out of the oven. Before I knew it, it was a full-blown party every year. We called it Cookie day, and I literally baked cookies all day in our tiny South Street apartment. I learned something about cookies. They will draw a crowd like nothing else. Even if you don’t eat them, they are a reminder of comfort, family, and love. The smell, the warmth, the […]

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